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bedroomraunchy - Man

.....non-sexual and sexy! can I be ?

So Uthink I got no sexlife? Ha! I may have no sexuality but my sensuality is in uberdrive. I been known 2B BISEXUAL! My fingaz n tongue r betta n any lesbian, I suck lyk a Dyson n theres always da Ann Summers platinum card!
Coz my sexuality never hapnd, puberty was cancelled. So my boyish pre-pubescent luks make me da cute mint gayz will kill 4.

But theyR guys! I ain't always felt gay. Thanx then 2 a lady pal years ago who tawt me evryfing I need 2 know wif da babez. So much that I went 4 a sauna last year and crashed on a swinging sesh. I just dived in and got all da goodies. Yeh, from the waist up I'm the man!

But rules say only guys hit on me! I give in, guess it's penis envy! And what bout Starkers naked disco in October? A few groups of guys were giving me the hatred stuff on the dance floor & I got real pissed bout it. I went for a last cruz on the dark balcony & this toned guy, hung like the Bayeux Tapestry, hit on me. Course, giving "the best oral service since town criers went outa fashion", I made an impression. He came back at the end & took me back to his place for some more closeup. Turns out he is a multi-millionaire interior designer. He rang me lasnite to hitch up again. Made!

I tellU what guys! Cut yo dicks off & U might just hook up as well as me! And to think I had nobody at all in my life until a cupla years ago! I'm still a virgin proper.

Hey, look girls. Listen up!

I've proved I got what it takes. Put threadz on me, I'm mint, well fit! Take em off and I have the body of an angel (think about it|). Just be my friend, just get 2know me, maybe meet me one day!

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