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... Jokes ...

... Glc Tones Jokes ...

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A Frenchman and an Italian were seated next to an Englishman on an overseas flight. After a few cocktails, the men began discussing their home lives.
´Last night I made love to my wife four times,´ the Frenchman bragged, ´and this morning she made me delicious crepes and she told me how much she adored me.´
´Ah, last night I made love to my wife six times,´ the Italian responded, ´and this morning she made me a wonderful omelet and told me she could never love another man.´
When the Englishman remained silent, the Frenchman smugly asked, ´And how many times did you make love to your wife last night?´
´Once,´ he replied.
´Only once?´ the Italian arrogantly snorted. ´And what did she say to you this morning?´
´Don´t stop.´

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Yo´ mama is so fat when she has sex, she has to give directions!

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Q: Why does the bar association prohibit lawyers and clients from having sex?
A: To prevent clients from being billed twice for essentially the same service.

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Q: Why is sex like snow?
A: You never know how many inches you´re going to get or how long it will last.

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A guy is walking along the beach, when he meets a girl with no legs, crying.
´Why are you crying?´ he asks.
´I´ve never been hugged,´ she says. The guy hugs her, but she continues crying.
´Why are you crying?´ he asks.
´I´ve never been kissed,´ she says. The guy kisses her, but she continues crying.
´Why are you crying?´ he asks.
´I´ve never been screwed,´ she says. The guy picks her up and throws her into the water.
´There,´ he says. ´Now you´re screwed.´

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E-Mail Me On: Glconway@02.co.uk


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