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The Miracle of Adoption

Date: 19-04-2007
Number of Views: 2517

My wife was quiet, almost distant as we left the party. Her voice quivered as I asked if anything was wrong. When we reached the car she broke down. It had been too much for her to once again be surrounded by parents with kids riding ponies and playing games. We had been married for eight years and the weight of being childless was becoming more than she could bear.

We were like many others who were experiencing infertility. My wife had had two problem pregnancies with one resulting in a very frightening surgery. We had consulted with specialists on infertility and were devastated when the last one said another pregnancy would not be viable.

Nearing our thirty-eighth birthdays, it became apparent that adoption could be the answer to our prayers for a child. We checked out books from the library and discussed the questions we had about adoption. What if the child bore no resemblance to either of us….could we still bond with and love it as our own? What if he/she grew and had interests that we did not share? How secure would we be….that the child would truly be ours and not be reclaimed at a later date by the birth parents? After resolving these questions, we scheduled an appointment with a social worker at a nearby agency.

The meeting was going well until we asked about the wait list. It was nearly four years for most couples. We submitted the application and waited. And we prayed. And we hoped for a miracle to come our way. We tried to stay busy so as not to focus on the hole we felt in our hearts. Forty-eight months seemed like an eternity and we weren’t getting any younger.

We did what most couples do in this situation. Try to keep each other’s spirits up and continue to pray for a miracle. An evening phone call from a friend raised our hopes. He is a respected obstetrician and said he had an interesting appointment earlier that day. A patient had mentioned that her unmarried teenage daughter was pregnant and was considering adoption. Our hearts skipped a beat. He couldn’t do much but suggested the woman call the same agency we applied with and also encouraged us to phone our social worker.

The first miracle was about to take place. The birth parents had agreed to a meeting with my wife and me. We were thrilled and said prayers of thanks.

We had an immediate rapport with both birth parents and learned later that week that they’d chosen us to be the adoptive parents once the baby was born. Miracle #2. Even though we were euphoric at this news, the social worker cautioned us that the delivery was still three months away and that the adoption is only a sure thing once relinquishment papers are signed.

We took a deep breath. And we prayed. And we said surely God would not have blessed us with two miracles and then decide to leave us childless.

As the time for the birth approached, little did we know that our emotional roller coaster ride was about to begin. Miracle # 3 was received via a phone call to announce the birth of a healthy, beautiful little girl. We were surrounded by joyous friends who anticipated an immediate homecoming party for our daughter.

Later that week, our social worker called to say that the birth parents were wavering after having bonded with the child. We felt the coaster had left the track and plunged to the pavement below. My wife and I were allowed to visit the baby in the hospital and, after seeing her, this made it especially difficult. This child was beautiful and not having her join our family would have crushed us.

We came to dispute the saying of “time flies” as one day turned into one week and then two. Our hopes was fading as each day passed….but still we prayed. On day nineteen, we finally received the call signaling Miracle #4. The birth parents had agreed to relinquish and we’d sign the final papers immediately in court.

Miracle #5 was the homecoming party. Luckily, I videotaped most of it and people couldn’t see the tears flowing down my cheeks. I remember looking in the rear view mirror as we drove home and thinking---God, you are soooo good to bless us with this child. May we always make you proud as we raise this beautiful girl.

It took us about five minutes to bond with this angel and all of our questions were answered in a heartbeat. The years have been kind and she is about to graduate from high school. We still pray…..for her and her birth parents. I even pray that she’ll decide to want to meet her birth mother who lives in state. Somehow, I think God will find a way to have her attend our daughter’s graduation and wedding. Those would be miracles too.

As empty nest time approaches, my wife and I are convinced that God was right in the middle of these adoption miracles. He took the tears my wife shed and turned them into tears of joy. He has showed us that a life shared with a child is magical and miraculous.

Our daughter is the greatest gift imaginable and being a parent is a priceless joy. For those considering adoption, prayer is the best place to start. Let the Holy Spirit guide you because He’s at the heart of the miracle of adoption.

by Mike Hall

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