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The N-sane Shopping Network

Here at we like to provide a service for our loyal and self medicated readers , so we have introduced the
N-sane Shopping Network to provide you with unique and great offers.

Hey there , fed up of not having the right equipment for your job?
Well dont worry, now we have some great life changing offers for working safety minded suicide bombers . Being a suicide bomber can be hell on your hearing, so why not purchase some new N-sane bomb proof ear plugs, they'll protect your hearing very effectively, so you'll be able to work without the fear of deaf.

Got your ears protected now? Do people comment on how nice your eyes are ? Well why not nip into your local N-sane shop and pick up some new bomb proof eye goggles , we have tried and tested them specifically for suicide bombers and the feedback we have got from former suicide bombers is amazing , your eyes well be perfectly preserved while everything around you is blowing apart.

Are you a suicide bomber worried about losing things? Well take some time to purchase our great new bomb proof numbered stickers , so while you might lose your mind you'll always be able to keep count of your limbs at work.

Having trouble getting insurance for your line of work ?
Well dont worry the N-sane insurance firm will take time and care to deal with suicide bombers . We only charge £8000 a month and we will pay out £14,000,000 to family in the event of your death.

N.B we only pay out on the event of accidently death.


I do not condone suicide bombing , It is a terrible thing that happens in society plus it is one of the largest known contributors for heart burn and can lead to more severe injuries. I refer to suicide bombing as in the blowing up of ones self not the act of killing yourself by diving into a swimming pool as many people with learning difficulties( Blazin' squad fans) may believe. In all seriousness suicide bombing is a terrible act and really not funny and should never be attempted , not even if u can persuad a certian boy band to do it to themselves.


Well ending on a lighter note we have a message from one of many organisations that want to advertise on the

" There will be a meeting of the amateur suicide bombers club at 7:30 pm on friday , new members are always welcome so come along and join in and we'll all have a blast "

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