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SMS Stuff

SMS INSULTS & QUOTES...

*SMS INSULTS*

Roses are red,
voilet are blue.
Sugar is sweet,
but not as sweet as you.
But the voilets are wilting
and the roses are dead.
The sugarbowl is empty
and so is your head.


If your face had ´welcome´ written on it, it would make a perfect doormat.

Shouldn´t you have a lisence to be that ugly?

Calling you an idiot would be an insult to all the stupid people.

All day I thought of you. I was at the zoo.

I´d love to ask how old you are, but I know you can´t count that high.

Next time you shave try standing an inch or two closer to the blade.

Sure I´d love to help you out... Now which way did you come in?

Well they do say opposites attract, so I sincerely hope you meet someone who is attractive, honest, intelligent and cultured.

I look at the moon, the moon is beautiful. I look at you, I´d rather look at the moon again.

Kind, intelligent, loving and hot. This describes everything you´re not.

My darling, my lover, my beautiful wife. Marrying you really messed up my life.

Brains aren´t everything. Infact, in your case brains are nothing.

Don´t let your mind wander; it´s far too small to let it out on it´s own.

Never wrestle with a pig. You both get dirty and the pig likes it.

Hey friend, remember that without stupidity there would be no wisdom and without ugliness there would be no beauty, so the world needs you after all.

We have a strange and wonderful relationship. You´re strange and I´m wonderful.

Look at the world as one big chocolate cake. It would never be complete without a few sweets and nuts. Sweets like me and nuts like you.

I see your face when I´m dreaming. That´s why I wake up screaming.

Scientists all over the world are wondering how long a human being can live without a brain. Kindly tell them your age.

*SMS QUOTES*

How do you save a man from drowning?
Take your foot off his head.
.......................................

Cigarette: A fire at the one end, a fool at the other, and a bit of tobacco inbetween.
.......................................

Practice makes perfect, but nobody´s perfect, so why practice?
.......................................

There cannot be a crisis today; my schedule is already full.
.......................................

Minds are like parachutes. They work best when open.
.......................................

Borrow money from pessimists; they don´t expect it back.
.......................................

I can only please one person per day. Today is not your day. Tomorrow isn´t looking good either.
.......................................

Hard work never killed anybody, but why take the risk?
.......................................

You can´t change your miserable life, but you can make others join you.
.......................................


Experience is the name people give to their mistakes.
.......................................

Nothing is illegal unless you get caught!
.......................................

If you think your boss is stupid, just remember: you wouldn´t have a job if he was any smarter.

*MORE 2 COME...*


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